ten-fold

I like results.  They motivate me to keep up the consistency, as well as provide inspiration to change up my routine.  Tonight included TKD, independent practice (with Ab Ripper X), and KB.  I was worn out when I got home, but it's a good feeling.  I've finally wound down after my shower and am about to pass out.  I feel so much stronger lately, and it's a great feeling.  I like being proud of myself for this accomplishment.

It took a long time to get the habit established, but now that it's set in, I will fight tooth and nail to keep it up.

My next test for Bo Cho Dahn is next Friday night.  I'm not nervous about forms or self-defense, or even my kicking break.  What worries me is sparring and the power break.  The focus of my attendance next week will be the power break because I can't seem to get the rhythm of it.  Conceptually I know what I should be doing, but coordinating all the body parts and the mind to focus strength and power into one point is more challenging than I realized.  I've watched many people do this break, and some of them make it look easy.  I've also seen several people beat their hands against a concrete slab to no avail, and I desperately do not want to be one of those people.

During tonight's practice, I put my hand through the practice boards 2-3 times, but I also attempted several thuds.  They're discouraging because all that force you use to unsuccessfully break through has to go somewhere when the boards don't split.  Usually, it rebounds back into your hand, arm, and shoulder and is quite painful, especially after repeated attempts.  On the occasions where I broke through, I remember a rush of power and no fear.  I knew I was going to break it before I did so it was a piece of cake.  The problem was recreating that surety and summoning the courage--more accurately, displacing the fear of failure.  This is only practice...Imagine a room full of people watching, when the pressure is ten-fold.